I know many women (and men) who have come out of abusive relationships. Sometimes they jump right back into one. There are many reasons for this. One of them is that they feel adrift without their abusive mate, and they have not yet learned to value themselves. So, they rush into a new relationship before they have completely healed from the last one, and wake one morning to find they are in another abusive relationship.
It doesn’t have to be this way!
Do you know that every Christian is the bride of Christ? Does this mean anything to you? If you are His bride, then, for now, I recommend you consider Jesus your husband. Several years after I left my abuser, when my second husband and I began seeing each other, I shared Joshua Harris’s book I Kissed Dating Goodbye* with him. I told him I was in no rush to jump into a relationship. I wanted to take things slowly and determine if he was the man God wanted me to marry.
In return, he shared a poem with me he had been living by. We don’t know who wrote it, but we have shared it with many single people who long for a spouse. I pray it comforts you.
True Love ~ Author Unknown
Everyone longs to give themselves to someone
To have a deep soul relationship with another,
To be loved thoroughly and exclusive-but God says to the Christian:
“No, not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and
content with being loved by Me alone
Having an intensely personal; and unique relationship
with me alone
Discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found
Will you be capable of the perfect human relationship
that I have planned for you.
You will never be united with another until you are united in Me
Exclusive of anyone or anything else, exclusive of any
other desires or longings;
I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow
Me to give you the most thrilling Plan existing-one
that you cannot imagine.
I want you to have the best. Please allow Me to bring it to you.
Just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things.
Keep experiencing the satisfaction that I AM.
Keep listening to the things that I tell you.
That’s all. Don’t be anxious. Don’t worry.
Don’t look around at the things that others have
gotten or that I have given them.
Don’t look at the things you think you want.
You just keep looking off and away up to Me, or you’ll
miss what I want to show you.
And then, when you’re ready,
I’ll surprise you with a love far more wonderful that
you would dream of.
You see, until you are ready and until that one I have
for you is ready,
(I am working even at this moment to have both of you
ready at the same time)
until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me
and the life I have prepared for you,
you won’t be able to experience the love that
exemplifies your relationship with Me,
and this is the perfect love.
And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love.
I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me,
And to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting
union of beauty, perfection and love that I offer you with Myself
Know that I love you utterly.
I am God. Believe it and be satisfied.
May God bless you today and always,
* Joshua Harris I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A New Attitude Toward Romance and Relationships (Multnomah Publishers:Colorado Springs, CO, 1997)